There are worse things than an Irked Jerk

This is for you, Nameless Jerk

Well, well, well, my riding compatriots. Do you all like how the world is going to hell in a hand basket? What with the London Riots, Flash Mob Hit Squads and general hatefulness of the human race? Can things get worse for us...Uh YEAH!

Open letter to the Jerk who deliberately tried to injure/kill me on my scooter the other day:

Dear C*ck Nozzle,

After repeatedly cutting me off and hitting your brakes on Route 53/ I-55 the other day... did you go home and tell your friends:

"Wow! I really messed with this girl on a scooter in rush hour traffic! It was great.

First - I almost hit her when I cut in front of her. Yeah! That was cool. But she beeped at me and went around me. That's when sh*t got crazy.

I went around her while she was turning right and cut her off! Yeah, while she was turning right, I went around her on the left and the cut her off! I hit my brakes and she almost hit my car! Hysterical!!!!

But that's not the end of it.... I then kept cutting in front of her and hitting my brakes.. In heavy traffic! It was AWESOME! I really kept dicking her over. But she finally got away from me so I had to just had to smile and wave goodbye. That will teach her to avoid getting hit by my car. Bi-otchs who beep better watch out when I drive! Take the hit or suffer the consequences!"

Wow Dude, you are a true humanitarian. Yeah, messing with a girl, on a scooter in rush hour traffic, you are the MAN! No one beeps at you and lives to tell about it! YEAH! you testosterone-laden imbecile.

I tell you now... nameless J-hole... you feckless piece of meat, you herpes sore on the face of human race, you breeder of now and future idiot children. You dingle berry on the butt of the gene pool Enjoy your great triumph. Yeah you are a winner! You WIN!!! You get to drive your car in front of me...while I ride home....to my house.. (which is paid for), on my scooter, (which is paid for) and enjoy my life, because God gave me the talent, the ability, and the grace to deal with jerks like you on a daily basis.

I am sure EVERYONE who lives in your Hillbilly Haven will love to hear about your great road rage battle with a 126 lb woman on a scooter during rush hour. What a HERO!

You're Number One!

Electric Scooter Company in Ann Arbor MI makes it's mark

Ann Arbor Company Building Electric Bikes: MyFoxDETROIT.com

Since I grew up in between Detroit and Ann Arbor, and I know the current condition of the job market in that area. So I really hope this company takes off. But you just don't see scooters in Michigan like you do here in Illinois. I might see a few scooters a week during my commute to Midway, and I have seen quite a few of them downtown. But in all my trips back and forth to Michigan, I think I have seen one scooter on the road.

I am hoping I am wrong, but with the depressed economy, it will be hard to see these scooters in a state where the inhabitants are already running on empty.

NonPlayer Comic - Very Interesting Scooter Concepts

Hmmm which do I want, Futuristic Scooter or Floating Swan!

Nate Simpson, wunderkind of the Comic World has previewed his latest work much to the delight of nerds across the universe.

He recently presented advance copies of his new comic, Nonplayer #1 at WonderCon this weekend. Filled with lush colors and complex images while, hinting at mulit-layered stories and characters, Nonplayer is already being scoped by Hollywood as a possible feature film!

Check this out: Nonplayer is a series about a Tamale Delivery Girl in the future is apparantly a "an Uber Bad Azz in the future worlds latest and greatest "simulated life/computer game" called Warrior of Jarvath.

I have to say, both the scooter concepts have it goin' on! ATGATT girl on the futuristic scooter plus an Elven Qween on the Floating Swan! I want them BOTH! I can just see me riding my Floating Swan down the I-55 into work! Stay back Trucks... I am riding a FRICK'n SWAN!!!!

I am already liking this... Butt-Kickin' Tamale Delivery Girl stuff! You know those tamales bring on the spicy action!

See more at:

http://www.comicsalliance.com/2011/03/30/nate-simpson-nonplayer-interview/#ixzz1UA4tyvjZ

Detroit Thunderdrome Rat Racer Glory!

Detroit Thunderdrome!!! Fastest way to a compound fracture!

Behold ravenous rat racers and lovers of busted-A$$ cheap beaters. Here be the abandoned Dorais Velodrome in Detroit Michigan, now reclaimed by a bunch of Rat Racers and partially restored to it's former Bone Smashing, Butt Scraping GLORY!

For a few years now, the brave/fool-hardy have been racing on the broken slopes of this TOW-up, pothole ridden and graffiti covered mess found in north Detroit.

These rat races were created by professional auto journalists Andy Didorosi and Ben Wojdyla after re-discovering the abandoned velodrome while working for a volunteer "Mowing Gang" that is cleaning up Detroit.

"When we first saw it, we thought it would be great to take out mini bikes around. Then we decided to tell our friends. Once the Detroit News put us on the front page, everything exploded." said Didirosi in a previous interview.

The Velodrome was constructed in 1968 and has fallen into disrepair since the 1990's. Didirosi and Wojdyla dealt with the Parks-n-Rec nay-sayers, then organized a clean-up & repair in 2010 and now the track is (semi) ready for the brave and foolish to test their mettle.

The race classes include scooters, go carts, pit bikes, mopeds, mountain bike, and single speed messenger bikes.

Stop by the Motor City September 10th and give it a try kiddies... if you have the ballz!

Bike Bondage - Trailering your Scooter

I HATE TRAILERING MAH SCOOTER! But it is a necessary evil.

We decided to take the bikes up to Wisconsin Dells for a wee vacation at a resort.

The journey was about 200 miles. I wanted to ride, but we had too much stuff and too many kids to ride up. So again, we used my BFs brother's trailer to carry the bikes.

This is the same trailer that bottomed out before. The extra weight of the bike and the scooter had flattened the springs, causing the trailer to drag on the ground.

My BF's brother re-enforced the leaf springs with square iron spacers, so if the trailer dipped or bounced, the leaf springs would not flatten. This is what happened last time we used the trailer. But luckily my BF's brother is resourceful and can fix just about anything.

However, I am a Nervous Nellie when it comes to hauling my scooter anywhere. My BF rolled on his bike and only used 2 straps to hold it down and he was ready to go.

Me, I wanted at LEAST 4 straps. My scooter is WAY wider than his old skinny street bike. Plus the possibility of cracking the plastic body as we strapped it down had me freaking out.

Loading a scooter on to a trailer is nerve wracking to say the least. Getting it up there, into the slots and then holding it in place, while my BF tries to strap it down scares the Bee Jeebies outta me! Honestly, I had at least 5 hot flashes during this procedure. The dang thing is HEAVY and when it starts to tilt, I can't hold it up.

Me: "Ding Dabbit! I can't hold this fokking-thing myself!" ( I curse when freaked out) "You know I can't hold it right? I mean, I am a 50 year old woman with arms like pipe cleaners for Cripes sake! I can barely hold my bladder during an office meeting!"

Plus the way the trailer rails were constructed, (wooden 4 x 4s screwed into the floor) I could not turn the front tire and lock it in place. It was made to hold motorcycles straight.

Once the first strap is on, it really helps. The second helps and then the third and fourth seals the deal. I have to say the trailer and the strapping proved very reliable. But every time we drove over a big bump in the road, I was cringing and wanting a nerve pill.

Unloading the scooter is even worse. Popping the straps has the scooter shifting in a split second and it is scary as heck. My BF ended up sitting on my scooter and I popped the straps. Then he backed it down the ramp, making the entire procedure look as easy as pie and making me look like a total a$$.

So I guess trailering my scooter is something I will just have to get used to over time. Nothing that a few valium or something with a "v" in it won't help.

Riding in the Rain

We trailered the bikes up to the Wisconsin Dells where it rained on and off for a few days.

A couple times we got caught riding in the rain. This, according to my BF is TERRIBLE!!!

Honestly, he says that riding in the rain has the same safety level as base jumping, parkour, or not flossing daily. He tells me that I am acting IRRESPONSIBLY when I want to go riding in POSSIBLY rainy weather.

It's not like I am promoting sex with out condoms here... I am talking about taking a ride on a cloudy day.

Well, maybe it was because I was riding a scooter and not a bike, but it wasn't all that bad to me. We went slow. It was a bit scary, but I kept it loose and took it easy. The rain did get very cold and stingy, but I knew that we were going be back at the resort soon, so I stayed focused and just enjoyed the challenge.

Result of this experience: I will go out on a limb and say that I think scooters are better than motorcycles when in the rain.

First, the your legs can be tucked behind your front faring, instead of hanging out getting hit with rain, mud and dirt.

Second, the windshield plus the helmet really helps with keeping your vision relatively clear.

My BF rides a street bike, with no windshield or faring. Zero protection. But he refused to get a windshield or a larger bike with faring. He doesn't like the look.

Well I don't like the look of the windshield on my scooter, but when it comes to double protection + comfort, I will happily nerd up my bike.

So, I have ridden in the rain at least 2 times now and, while cautious, I am not afraid. I know that if it gets really terrible, I will just pull over and wait for the weather to clear. And waiting sometimes is part of the journey.

'rush hour'

My "Rush Hour" is NOT like this....

Every time I ride my scooter to work, I wish I could take photos of the GNARLY traffic jams and near accidents I see.

Then I go online and fine stuff like this.

You know, my commute is not that bad.